What is the difference between self esteem and self image?
Self esteem is confidence in one's own worth or abilities in other words how much respect you have for yourself, how kindly you treat yourself. (Having a good self esteem is almost like treating yourself as you would a good friend).
Self image is the way you see your abilities, looks and personality it’s based upon whether you like yourself or not, the way you view yourself whether that be positively or negatively.
How can I fight off negative thoughts or feelings about myself?
Take it in steps to slowly create more positive thoughts from originally negative thoughts.
For example if I think to myself “I’m never going to a job that interview went horribly”.
Now let’s take that and see how we can turn it to a neutral, not positive nor negative thought. “That interview for that job didn’t do to plan however it could have gone worse”
From here you can then start to move onto a bit more positive ideas from these negative thoughts. “I didn’t do well in this job interview but I know I can do better next time, I’m hardworking and smart, I am loved”
How to be kinder to yourself.
Everyone makes mistakes. This is always important to remember however sometimes low self esteem and a negative self image can block us from seeing this.
A simple way to try to tackle negative thoughts about oneself is to think if a friend did or felt what you did and is doing what you are doing would you treat them the same, as you are treating yourself now?
For example if I was thinking “I ruined my brother’s birthday because I forgot about it” I would take a step back take a slow deep breathe and think about the following.
- If a friend of mine forgot about her brother’s birthday is she really to blame?
- If so how can she make up for this?
- How could she try to set things right?
- Does she deserve some self love and care right now?
- Was her intentions bad or good?
If they were good she did not do wrong we all make mistakes.
Now go back to yourself and do what you would do to a friend in this situation to yourself.
If you think that friend needs some pamper or video game time, try to give yourself that.
Post it notes around a mirror or on a pair of scales.
To create a positive surrounding for your self image or self confidence, write down some things you don’t mind about yourself or that a friend or family member likes about you.
A good one is eyes, every pair of eyes is unique along with each cell in your body. That’s always something to admire as it’s one of a kind.
If you don’t love your body right away that’s okay. We grow and change constantly throughout our lives. Others do in fact see us as different people compared to how we see ourselves. (This is shown from a experiment with ordinary people in the link below)
How can I be more confident in myself?
During presentations for example. Body language is rather important. If you slouch a lot your going to feel uncomfortable and therefore not seem as easy to approach by others. Try to lean your shoulders back you don’t have to make eye contact to begin with. If you speak louder it makes you come across as more confident and within time your confidence can build as those around you observe you as being confident and someone they can confide and spent time with.
It takes time and steps to feel confident with yourself. Know that it’s okay to take your time. Focus on one part at a time. It’s okay to take your time and be proud of the fact your taking the time to figure out what you love and what you don’t love so much but are learning to love. Nobody is perfect.
Treating yourself at least once a week is very important when it comes to a low self esteem and negative self image.
Self love/care can come in many forms, big and small.
Small ways to treat/care for oneself.
- Take a long bath.
- Paint your nails.
- Get a hug.
- Take a walk to the park.
- Visit an animal shelter.
- Get some new outfits.
- Watch some tv or head out for a walk.
- Have a tasty snack.
- Tell someone you trust something your proud of.
- Buy yourself something you have always wanted.
- Big ways to treat/care for oneself.
- Take a vacation.
- Head to the cinema.
- Take a cooking class or art class.
- Have a mini spa day.
- Go out for dinner.
- Give yourself a makeover.
- Have someone rub your feet.
- Write an achievement list to come back to later.
Written by _LilacRose14_#6995 (Lily)